Imagine...your ad here

Do you have a dream? I do. I have a bunch of them actually. One of them is to live in a world surrounded by people who spend their money carefully and consciously on things that are in line with their personal ethics. Another is to work from home so I can be physically and mentally present for my son who has Asperger's Syndrome and my daughter who more than likely has ADHD. I want to be here to bake bread twice a week, tend a garden that feeds us most of the year and pursue my passions-knitting and sewing. My dream is to combine the two using this blog as a vehicle.
If you look to the right of this blog post, beneath my Etsy shop you'll see a new thing: a place for sponsors. I'm looking for business owners who are passionate about their product or service, who are living out their dreams of providing a Something that makes this world a better place. You could be a spinner of wool looking for a new place to advertise your wares. You could be a teacher of an on-line course that will give people tools they can't find elsewhere. You could be a maker of beautiful, ethically-made toys. Whatever you do or make, there is a place over yonder for your ad with a link to your website to get the word out.

The word "imagine" to me looks like the face of a child writing her name in the air with a sparkler on a warm, spring night. That's why I chose this photo of my daughter from last May. I love the look of wonder and joy on her face. It reminds me of how it feels to dream a dream and watch it turn into reality.
If you are a business owner interested in having your ad over there please click here, or click the photo to the right or check out my Sponsorship page for all the information. If you a reader who knows of someone who might be interested I encourage you to send them my link and let them know I'm here.

Frustration, Contentment and Some Words about Knitting

I've been pretty quiet here this week. I had things to say and I really wanted to join in with Ginny's Yarnalong on Wednesday but the thing is this old laptop of ours is full up to capacity with photos and whatever else takes up memory on a laptop. I couldn't cram one more thing into it and surfing the internet is taking forever. I'm feeling pretty frustrated this week. We need to update the operating system and get all these pictures onto an external hard drive but lack of knowledge, experience, time and confidence has been holding us back for months. I've said it before but this is the weekend we're just going to do this thing and hope for the best! Stupid technology.

While I've been feeling pretty frustrated at my inability to upload all the great photos I took this week at the beach I have been feeling pretty content with other aspects of life in general. Our monthly income has been greatly reduced by me not being able to do my former job anymore and I was really worried our day to day expenses would seriously eat into our savings. So far that hasn't been the case. Somehow, by the grace of God we've had just enough money to pay the bills, eat well and cover a few unexpected costs that have come up. Amazing. When I was working in a retail environment 5 days a week there were so many things I wanted to buy or felt we had to have but now that temptation is totally gone (except for the crock pot. I still really want a crock pot-does that make me weird or boring???). I feel content and satisfied and it's a nice feeling. I am apparently a lot nicer to be around too.
It's the knitting to be sure. I have time to knit. I wanted to show you a picture of the little, tiny heel and toe socks I finished knitting on the weekend. The recipients were happy with them too. I wanted to show you the mouse mittens I'm almost done. I knit the mittens months ago and the spirit finally moved me to make the ears and they are so very awesome. It is with great sadness and some relief that I've decided to frog the Kirin Shawl. I just can't get the rthym of it and its driving me mental. I don't know if it's me or the pattern but we need some apart time. Sometimes you just have to accept that some knitting isn't meant to be. I have a few ideas for the wool but haven't settled on anything yet.
If I could upload photos to this tired dinosaur of a computer I would show you the gorgeous scarf I found yesterday. It was in the lost and found bin at work, headed for the Goodwill store and I snatched it up lickety-split. It's a basket-weave pattern knit from sock wool in this orange-mauve-brown variegated colourway. Being a knitter I know that if I had lost a hand-made scarf I'd want to know that someone found it who appreciated the all of it. So, if you were in an outdoor store in Waterloo last winter and you lost a scarf matching this description you can thank your lucky stars it has found it's way to a knitter's house and is being well cared for. Unfortunately you can't have it back because it's MINE, MINE, MINE now (enter maniacal laughter)

What we Teach Our Children

There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth in our household tonight from The Boy about finances. He is wanting a new pocket knife but doesn't have enough to pay for it from his own funds. It was interesting to see his thought process and how what we've taught him has sunken through the layers. First he asked if there was some way for him to earn the money he was short. I told him he should check with his aunt and Oma and see if they needed some jobs done that they would be willing to pay him for. Then he asked if I could just give him the money. I told him we don't get paid again for another week and that wasn't going to work as we'd like to eat and put gas in the car, not to mention have enough money in the bank to cover the outstanding cheque for his summer Scout camp. Then he asked about money owed to him. I found it interesting how the whole conversation made me squirm a bit from having to say we couldn't afford to just give him money to how yes, we did owe him money for the use of his camera but couldn't pay him right now. Our own relationships with money get laid bare when having these types of conversations with our children. I am heartened by some of the things I can see he's learned such as how money is earned through hard work and that saving up for something is important (delayed gratification).
We live within our means, making sure our bills are paid each month and that we are both home each night for dinner. We don't have much extra right now so what little that is left over after bills and groceries has to be carefully spent. Some months that means a new furnace filter and shoes for growing feet and some months that means we go out for breakfast as a family because we need a treat.
I think my children will learn more from growing up in a thrifty home than if we gave them every opportunity we could and worried about how we would pay the mountain of credit card debt needed to make them "well rounded adults". What do you think?

Trying

Today I am trying to:
Remember that this winter will not last forever,  that this new dose of snow and cold is only temporary and in a month from now there will be robins and bare, muddy ground and maybe even crocuses poking up their heads. The kids will be outside more than inside doing stuff like this:

Keep in mind that most things are only temporary like money being tight and these kids talking always in my ear. That one day in the all too near future The Boy will not be around so much and I will miss hearing all about his week at Grandma and Grandpa's house and being "made" to watch the Rick Mercer Report. And once that car is paid off we will have extra money again.

Maintain a positive attitude because I may not always love my job or cleaning toothpaste spit off the bathroom sink but it's not all that bad at the end of the day. A positive attitude changes everything including the people around you. The trick is to find the happy and hold onto it.

Relax and do what I want to do instead of what I think I should do. I always see the messes that need to be cleaned up, and the lunch that needs to be made and I tire myself out so I have nothing left to give. Today I will knit some and read some and the messes can be cleaned up tomorrow.

Advice from this side of the snugli

Friends of ours are pregnant with their first child. My feelings upon hearing this news were surprisingly mixed. At first I thought "that's so great" because I love babies and I have a hankering to hold one. Then I thought "Wow are they in for a ride!" because parenting is no easy gig. Rewarding yes, but not easy.
I was trying to think what I would give them as a gift and quickly dismissed the usual onesies, sleepers and toys. They'll get all that from doting relatives and friends. I remember when my own children were small that we didn't have much extra money and I only bought 2 toys for them until they were 3. I also remember depending on birthday and Christmas gifts to fill their closets with what they needed for clothing. Thrift shops were even out of the question, we were so tight for money. While it was hard in those early years I don't think my children wanted for anything. They had a few toys that we rotated, plenty of books and enough clothing to get through the season. What we did receive was very much appreciated and well looked after. So from my perspective, what to give as a meaningful gift that would be truly appreciated? This is what I've come up with so far:

A blank book and a pen-for recording firsts, memories and little stories. My mother in law has filled 2 blank books with stories of her days with my son when he was small. I have books filled with odds and ends that I love to revisit. There are things in there that I would never have remembered if I hadn't taken 2 bleary-eyed moments to write down.

Parenting books-my favourites are The Baby Book by Dr. Bill Sears. Everything from the value of attachment parenting to what Fifth's Disease looks like. Also Raising Your Kids Without Raising Your Voice by Sarah Chana Radcliffe. I've read a lot of great parenting books and this one worked the best for us. Kids are Worth It by the great Barbara Colorosa. It's never too early to start talking about rules and discipline with your significant other.

Kleenex-I always seem to be running out of it at the worst moments!

Coupons for a year's worth of free babysitting-new parents get so caught up in looking after the new person in their life that they forget to look after their relationship. Never mind the cost of a babysitter when you're down to maternity leave pay and one income.

What would you give a new parent that you yourself would have appreciated as a new parent?? What do you wish someone had told you when your first baby showed up on the scene?

Let's talk about money shall we?

I just sat down to get a handle on the family finances for this coming payperiod and it seems we'll be alright. Over the past several months I've taken a real interest in our budget after almost 14 years of leaving it to His Lordship. It just seemed easier and less overwhelming to let him deal with it all. Ostrich with her head in the sand? Yup that was me. Not very responsible or grown up but I just couldn't handle seeing how things actually were.

After reading countless books on how to manage family finances I decided it was time to try it for myself. Wow. What an eye opener. Do you know we bought 18 bottles of laundry soap last year? and we've been buying the super expensive, scent-free, environmentally friendly kind. Ouch. It's the little everyday decisions that really add up.
Beyond making a budget and meal-planning and grocery lists I learned a few lessons between the lines of all those books. One of the best ones I read although I didn't realize it at the time was Peace and Plenty by Sarah Ban Breathnach, the author of Simple Abundance.

(Does this photo look familiar?)
She shares her story of financial success and subsequent down-ward spiral after Simple Abundance became a best seller. One of the best concepts I got from that book was that money is precious and almost like a living thing. If you want it to stay in your life you need to treat it well and with respect. In other words: spend mindfully.
Another book I read taught me to regard every cent as valuable. Look at the actual amount of income and expenses instead of just rounding up or down to make the math easier. Take those extra cents and put them in a jar. They will eventually add up to something significant. We once paid for a steak dinner out of our change jar. Mind you, we couldn't go back to that restaurant for awhile after leaving $100 in rolled change to pay the bill but it was well worth it!
We work really hard to live within our means. We hardly ever eat out, we don't have tv and we often have to say no to each other when someone wants something. But that's just how it is. We also don't have any debt except our car and mortgage.
I think we live a simpler and less stressful life because we don't have a lot of extra money in our lives. There's a lot of front-stoop-sittin' that goes on in the summer and lots of game-playing and reading that goes on in the winter. We almost always eat dinner as a family at home and our summer holidays are spent at our family cottage where the only extra expense is the gas to get there. It's not a bad life ;)

When the going gets tough, the tough make muffins

Our fridge was looking pretty empty this morning when we peered in trying to figure out what to send the kids to school with for lunch. This week we've been trying to stretch the food we have until we get paid next and can go grocery shopping. The last day is always the most...interesting. Usually I can come up with something that a dietician won't faint at the sight of but today we hit a new low. To my children's delight we packed them hot dogs. In my feeble defense there was a piece of whole-grain bread to wrap the hot dog in and an apple. Sigh. We do our best and sometimes that means hot dogs in lunches and you have to deal with your inner critic who tells you if you had just planned better you could've had a meal fit for the pages of Today's Parent magazine. If only the inner critic would get off her high horse and take a look at the family finances and remember that at least they went to school with something when there are parents out there who have nothing to send.

When I got home from work this afternoon I was faced with the same dilemna only I had time on my side. When the going gets tough, the tough make muffins. And this mom whipped up a batch of Lorna's Apple Muffins from my favourite old, battered copy of Muffin Mania. As a treat to my kids I only reduced the sugar a little bit and used the cream called for in the recipe instead of the healthier milk-alternative ;)

I'll take my Mom of the Year Award now please.
I would include a picture of the finished product but they were practically inhaled and now there are only the teeny, sad ones left.
We stopped at the grocery store on the way home from picking up His Lordship from work and the cupboards now contain more than crumbs and couscous. Tomorrow's lunches: cheese bread sandwiches with shaved roast beef and lettuce, greek yogurt tubs and bananas. Much better.