Monday Knitting and Musings

Yesterday I managed to get the first pair of my Valentine's Day mitts assembled and took photos in the brilliant sunshine we had here in south-western Ontario.

I wanted to add a little something to cheery red mittens without it being in-your-face Valentine's Day-centric and I think the little hearts and buttons do the trick. The buttons are different on each mitten and I like the eclectic effect. More original that way. I have a grey pair for kids on the needles right now. I'm trying to decide if they'll get pink hearts or purple. Stay tuned for the riveting conclusion ;)

I'm having trouble with my camera, getting it to balance out the light and dark of an object without the dark looking over-exposed. I really need to google this problem. Do you have any suggestions on what to do??

In other news, it was a busy day of driving all over the countryside for my husband and I. We drove 40 mins to meet with the doctor who has completed a learning assessment on our daughter to discuss how to present this document to the special ed department at school and get some accommodations for The Em-ster. They aren't crazy or difficult-a fidget toy to help her listen in class, someone to scribe for her and/or a reduction in the written work that she struggles so much with. Writing is hard for her and one of the things we need to do is get someone to look at the way she writes and suggest some exercises to improve it. 

In April we meet with a pediatrician to discuss how to go about testing her formally for ADD/ADHD. It will be nice to have an answer finally one way or another and a plan for dealing with whatever it is. I keep remembering what Kim John Payne says in Simplicity Parenting- a quirk+stress=a disorder. It spurs me on to continue simplifying her environment and to encourage her to get lots of fresh air and exercise. I don't expect it all to magically erase a diagnosis but I believe it might just help alleviate some of the symptoms. 

So that's what's up around here this Monday in the dead of January. Another ordinary day in an ordinary week in an ordinary month. 

Maybe ADHD Part 2, Plus Some Daydreaming

Today I met with our family doctor to discuss the Em-ster's symptoms and see what the next steps would be. To be absolutely honest my assumption was she would refer me to a pediatrician or some specialist and the Em-ster would sit on a waiting list for awhile. Instead my doctor asked about major changes in our lives (none), bullying at school (none), does she hate going to school and resist homework (yes!). Then she told me to remove all simple sugars from her diet. I hadn't thought of that although we don't generally have a lot of simple sugars in our house and diet anyway. The Em-ster and I do like to bake together however so that's going to require some creativity as I think we need to do things that are positive and bolster our relationship. I know honey is a problem for her. Maple syrup seems to be fine. I haven't really experimented with other options. She does have a problem with sugar and tends to binge on it whenever she can get her hands on it which is something I'm trying to figure out how to deal with in a healthy way.
Next my doctor asked if we have any health coverage and I said not a lot. She sighed and said there is such a long wait list for children to be assessed for ADHD. Not good. So before I see her next I need to get the Em-ster's eyes and hearing checked to rule those possibilities out then get a blood test done to rule out a thyroid problem. So many things I hadn't thought of. Well, to be honest I had but I tend to think of so many things all at once that I only really listen to the ones yelling in my ear. I sometimes miss the small, quiet, really important things. Sigh.
So that's my update. I'm grateful that we're moving forward but I also feel slightly overwhelmed at all the things I need to get done that require time and energy of which I feel are in short supply. Our lives are far too busy and I crave simplicity right now.
Every summer we spend a week at our cottage in the middle of nowhere. It really is in the middle of nowhere and takes 8 hours to get there from our home in Southern Ontario. Once we're there though it's quiet and unpopulated and blissful. There's no running water except that which we pump from a hand pump. The electricity comes from a few solar panels we have but mostly we use oil lamps and headlamps for light at night. The toilet is a composting one in the woodshed. We spend our days outside puttering and simple things like cooking and cleaning take longer and are actually a pleasure. At night we all sit on the couch in front of the picture windows and watch the sun go down over the lake and watch night come in. It is so relaxing and peaceful and....simple. I wish I could bottle it and sell it. I would make a fortune.
It is at this time of the year when winter has become unwelcome and spring is slow in coming and I am feeling overwhelmed by everything that needs to be done in a day that I miss our week at the cottage the most.

Maybe ADHD?

When I was at home with The Boy after the Em-ster was born it was a challenge. That's putting it lightly. He was so active and so prone to melt downs and into EVERYTHING.

It was exhausting. By the time he began going to kindergarten we had it more or less under control or at least were used to our "normal". His teachers could all see that something was up and put into practice all the strategies they had at their disposal and helped to get him a psychological assessment. By the time he was in Grade 1 we had a name for his collection of symptoms: Asperger's Syndrome. Looking back 6 1/2 years later it all seemed to fall into place so nicely. At 12 1/2 The Boy is fairly calm, able to self-advocate and is pretty easy to deal with. Now that we've got him all sorted out it seems it's his sister's turn.
I thought I would share with you today my journey thus far with our second child. All seemed to be going along smoothly until this year. This year we started to see an escalation in melt downs, mood swings and trouble sleeping. At school she dazes off, has trouble finishing her work and is bouncy. It's been a stressful year for all of us and I thought it was just a compatibility problem with the teacher but after several meetings with her teacher and one with the principal it seems that's not it. It seems there's something else going on there. Like all good mothers I of course turned to my friend Google and began researching her symptoms. I began Googling all the syndromes that might explain why she behaves the way she does. I started with Asperger's but that didn't fit. I tried Bipolar Disorder, also no. Then I tried ADHD. Wow. That felt like the right fit. I researched further, took out books from the library and read everything I could. They describe her to a tee. Especially the emotional side of the disorder that I had no idea existed. I just knew about the fidgety-inattentive side. I am taking it all with a grain of salt because we don't have a diagnosis and I don't want to head in a direction of thinking in case I'm wrong. I know my girl very well though. The tact I'm taking is that information is power and if I follow some of the suggestions in these books it's not likely to hurt. Especially the ones that tell me I need to be especially calm, cool and collected with her. That I need to be aware of how situations affect her such as a trip to the grocery store or library. There are a lot of choices in these places and a lot of distractions to overwhelm her. I know that long car trips without breaks are agonizing for her and so I make sure we stop a few times. Stuff like that.

                                                     (We all have skills-this is hers ;))
This is what I know and do so far. I hope hearing about my journey will help you with your journey. On Friday I have an appointment with our family doctor to see what the first step is to get an assessment.

Snowshoeing in Rosseau

This past weekend we went up to my parents' house in Rosseau to drop The Boy off for the week. It's March Break in our neck of the woods and he had arranged months ago to spend the week with them. The weather was beautiful-bright and sunny and not stupid cold. I borrowed some snowshoes from work so we could do some bush-wacking.
The Em-ster was all excited to try them out but the timing of our first attempt was bad. She had just gotten into trouble with her Dad for bothering her brother. We call it "poking the bear" or instigating. If she doesn't have anything else to do she'll find him and do whatever she can to get a response. All the better if it's a full-on losing of his cool. Having just arrived after almost 4 long hours in the car I was not paying attention to what was going on and when I clued in was really just hoping it would stop on it's own. I'm an optimist you see and tired. Fat chance. Anyway, by the time she'd gotten an earful from her dad she was pretty upset. Not a good time to try new things. Lesson learned. It was one of those times where I could see it coming a mile away but was hoping the distraction of these snowshoes would be enough to set her to rights again but I should've known better. Distractions do not work with this child of mine when she is in an oppositional mood. IF she has ADHD, which I strongly suspect she does then Oppositional Defiant Disorder would be her co-morbid. This of course is my extremely unprofessional opinion!
Needless to say the first attempt resulted in a melt down and everyone giving up and going inside. Sometimes you just have to know when to give up.
The next morning after a sleep and some breakfast she said to me "Can we try the snowshoeing again? I think I understand now how they work and I want to try." That's my girl. And try again we did. Just her and I and it was lovely to be there together.

Sometimes that's what we all need-the chance to try again after some sleep and bacon.